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3. Swept Away (1974) vs. Swept Away (2002)
The Italian original was directed by Lina Wertmuller, the first woman ever to be nominated for an Academy Award. The sequel was directed by Guy Richie and stars his wife, Madonna. That's all we have to say.

Except! Take a look at the original. Giancarlo Giannini plays a


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Communist yachthand stranded on a deserted island with an abusive wealthy socialite. Their power dynamic suddenly reversed, he begins to harass her. It's subversive, upsetting, hilarious and sexy — all the things that Madonna used to be, which makes her tepid, wooden performance in the remake all the more sad. The fact that her yachtsman is played by Giannini's son only emphasizes the lameness of the imitation. If only they would have kept some of his father's dialogue: "I'll kick you in the ass! And I'll keep kicking you, you ugly Social Democrat whore!" And, "Now I'm going to ram it in and split that fine little perfumed pussycat apart, and you're finally going to know a real man!" – Nicole Ankowski
Winner: Original

Swept Away (1974)


Swept Away (2002)



4. The End of the Affair (1955) vs. The End of the Affair (1999)
Based on the Graham Greene novel, both films focus on an illicit affair in war-torn London as the city literally crumbles around them. Julianne Moore and Ralph Fiennes have the clear advantage of making a film forty years after Deborah Kerr and Van Johnson, well after prudish production codes were abandoned. And no one does neurotic, complicated sex like Moore (Boogie Nights) and Fiennes (ah, The English Patient). Note the scene where the two lovers can't stop themselves, even as a bombing raid pummels the city — the building shakes, plaster rains down on their naked bodies, yet they can't take their eyes off each other. And neither can you. – N.A.
Winner: Remake

The End of the Affair (1955)


The End of the Affair (1999)


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©2007 Nicole Ankowski & Nerve.com


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